The V Spot

Rants, observations and home decorating from a woman with no time for a blog.

Words of wisdom for mothers of boys…

A few months ago my friend Sara over at Mom Endeavors had a brand new, beautiful baby boy…  He joined his two big brothers over at the Mom Endeavors family.  Knowing that I had a bit of experience with boys, Sara asked me to write up a little something about them.  I shared this over at her blog while she was still recuperating.  (Do you ever fully recuperate from childbirth…?  I don’t know that you do.  You’re certainly never quite the same.)

Anyhow, this is what I thought Sara needed to know:

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People will say really dumb things to you when they hear you have all boys.  It is usually along the lines of Oh, you are the Queen of the Castle!  Let me tell you something:

  • No Queen in history has ever had the words “OK!  Who peed on the wall?!” come out of her mouth.
  • No Queen in history has ever had to give people a lecture about toilet seats, or explain why it’s important to aim for the water, as opposed to just the general target of the toilet itself.
  • No Queen in history has ever encountered a real lizard while doing laundry. (True Story)
  • No Queen in history has ever had to issue a decree that there will be no stories, jokes or songs about bodily functions at the dinner table.
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Lizard.  In my washing machine. Not sure whose pocket he was in.
Boys will spend too much time on goofy things and not enough time thinking things through.
They will write on walls, bring home bugs, hit puberty at 60 miles an hour and stink up their rooms.
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They break things, lose things and fight over things.  Even if you were previously not a big fan of the color pink, you will start to buy personal items in that color.  It is the only way you can keep a hold of your hair brush, toothbrush, ear buds, calculator, etc.
If they skin their knees while playing, they will want to keep playing.  If they skin their knees while doing chores, they will need to lie down on the couch with their leg elevated.
If one of them cares about hygiene, clothes that match and takes care with his penmanship, the others will not.
They will find it easier to throw clean socks in their wastepaper basket than to throw them into their sock drawer.
They will sleep anywhere.
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It’s been said that a boy is noise with dirt on it.  This is true.  But they are also sweet.  And cuddly.  They are thoughtful and pick dandelions for you and tell you that you are the! best! mom! ever!  They will tell you that your cooking “…is almost as good as store bought!” and will mean it as high praise.
They will track dirt onto a carpet you just vacuumed to give you a hug and tell you they love you.
Raising boys will be the greatest adventure and most rewarding experience of your life and I hope you enjoy every single moment of it!  (Even if you can’t enjoy some of those moments until after they’re in bed and you’ve had yourself a glass of wine.)

**Update: Sara sure didn’t need any advice from me!  She is handling all 3 boys in stride and is busy cooking, crafting and dispensing all sorts of wisdom over at her blog.  I do hope you check it out.

15 Comments

1.

Hi I'm Shannon! said...

October 8, 2012 at 2:43 pm
I only have the one, but he is all BOY :) This made me think about when he was little. I'm all teared up now.
Thanks for that ;) lol
2.

THIS IS ME....ONLINE said...

October 8, 2012 at 3:07 pm
One other thing: I hear there is a special place in heaven for the mother of boys for all of those same reasons. Congratulations, lucky mom. I love my boys, too.
3.

Its So Very Cheri said...

October 8, 2012 at 3:57 pm
Great article Viv. I have 3 boys and a princess and it is amazing how different they all are.

Cheri
4.

LovePetunia said...

October 8, 2012 at 4:49 pm
I love this post! I am mother to just one 15 year old son-although I had 5 ultrasounds during my pregnancy-the doctors all though I was having a girl. Wrong! When my son was born, I thought "What am I going to do with a BOY???" Well, God knew exactly what he was doing when he gave me my dear son. I never knew the bond that mothers have with their sons. If I had had the opportunity to have more children, I would have loved more boys. Paul, my son, is truly the light of my life.
5.

justjenn said...

October 8, 2012 at 4:59 pm
Great post! I just wrote a blog post about urine and bathroom and boys the other day. I can relate with two boys!
6.

Stacy Risenmay said...

October 8, 2012 at 5:44 pm
Oh my word! I about peed my pants laughing (which after having 4 boys it is easier that it should be) when I read the part about skinning the knee while playing VS working. SO TRUE!!!! I loved the whole thing :)
7.

lisa lyle said...

October 8, 2012 at 6:56 pm
As a mom to four boys, I love love love this post!!!

you crack me up!

http://www.lylelife.com/
8.

Laura@Elegant Nest said...

October 8, 2012 at 10:16 pm
Well said Viv! I have lived through all of your points...except for the lizard one (thank goodness)! And I must say...it is good to be Queen, even when you are cleaning urine off the wall! :)
9.

lisbonlioness said...

October 8, 2012 at 11:24 pm
Can you write a post for the mother of my Mister and tell her that she SUCKED at her job?
I swear he's just like your boys (minus the poor, poor lizard, for want of lizards in my neck of the woods)... unfortunately, he's (counting years from 1978 to 2012, adding 5, looking away in horror) 39 and still does pretty much all the stuff you menton and then some. Add bunches of roses, Jackie Chan movies, take away raiding my pockets for change for a pint of milk in the morning and my using his razor and we're even. I am SO glad I only have one Mister and one weekend boy! Having four wee dudes plus one Mister 24/7 would quite possibly send me away on the crazy train, never to return- but what a fun rde it'd be!
10.

Tanya said...

October 8, 2012 at 11:39 pm
Aww, that was sweet to read, especially as I'm now patiently waiting for my third little guy to arrive (more than a week late so far). I love my boys, too. They are special in more and different ways than I ever could have imagined.
11.

MiMi said...

October 9, 2012 at 1:22 am
I was terrified at the thought that I'd have TWO boys.
But I wouldn't trade them for 20 girls.
Boys are sweet...and the thing is, they almost don't have it in them to be faking sweet, so you know it's genuine.
And I never really cared that much for pink either, but now I find myself buying it all the time just to mark as mine.
12.

MiMi said...

October 9, 2012 at 1:23 am
Oh, and one question I moms of boys always seem to get: Are you going to try for a girl?? Cuz apparently you HAVE to have a girl to be complete. LOL
13.

At The Picket Fence said...

October 9, 2012 at 4:13 am
I just LOVE this VIvienne! Being a mom to a boy has been one of the greatest joys and adventures of my life. My own sweet boy helped me make dinner tonight and we talked and laughed together and inside I was marveling at how the same child who was "tooting" uncontrollably on the trampoline an hour earlier was now calmly cooking with me. I'm so glad that God blessed me with the honor of being his mommy and I know that the adventure continues! :-)
Vanessa
14.

Corky805 said...

October 9, 2012 at 11:27 am
I love this post!! Boys are great!
15.

Lady Courtney said...

October 9, 2012 at 6:42 pm
This made me laugh!!! I had girls, totally different I am sure, my youngest grandchild (2 months old) is a boy, I cannot wait to see his antics, especially after hearing about his father, one of three boys. :)

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