If you should spot a celebrity... don't be a spaz.

I live in a part of California where if you swing that proverbial dead cat, you have better than average chance of hitting a Kardashian. Celebrity (ahem, using that term loosely) sightings often bring out the squealing dork in people.

A quick pop quiz, based on my own observations. (And from some of the horses' mouths.)

Scenario #1
You are eating a meal in a restaurant and you see a celebrity walk in with a group of people. Should you...

• (a) make an obvious, squealy racket and draw attention to yourself by loudly informing other diners, "OMG! It's So And So!!!"
• (b) stop with your fork halfway to your mouth and stare.
• (c) calmly and quietly inform the others at your table and then enjoy your meal. Quietly.

The answer is C.

Scenario #2
The celebrity's group is now seated at their table and enjoying their meal. Should you...

• (a) go up to their table, interrupt conversation and inform the celebrity that you are a huge fan. Assume that they are as excited to meet you as you are to meet them. Ask for an autograph. Assume they carry a pen and paper just for these occasions.
• (b) go up to their table, completely ignore that there are other people at the table and you have made their meal come to a screeching halt. Ramble on about how much you know about them or mention a relationship that ended badly for them.
  
• (c) do not go up to the table.

The answer is C.

Scenario #3
You are shopping and you notice a lone celebrity shopping nearby. Should you...

• (a) make an obvious, squealy racket and draw attention to yourself by loudly informing other shoppers, "OMG! It's So And So!!!"
• (b) run over to the celebrity, loudly asking for an autograph and repeating "I can't believe it's you!" over and over, like a parrot with Tourette's Syndrome.
  
• (c) calmly approach the celebrity, say hello and let them know you enjoy their work (or in some cases, the fact that they were able to get 6 shows on E! because of a sex tape). Ask for an autograph if you like that kind of thing.

The answer is C.

Scenario #4
You are shopping and you notice a celebrity and one or two other people shopping nearby. Should you...

• (a) make an obvious, squealy racket and draw attention to yourself by loudly informing other shoppers, "OMG! It's So And So!!!"
• (b) run over to the celebrity, wedge yourself between them and their friends, ask for an autograph. Only notice you are stepping on one of the friends because you need to borrow a pen and paper from them.
  
• (c) calmly approach the group. Acknowledge you don't want to interrupt... just want to say hello. If that is well received, ask for an autograph if you like that kind of thing.

The answer is C.

Bottom line? Don't be obnoxious. Some people say that "well, they asked for that when they became famous." Maybe. But they're still people (well, some of 'em. Not sure about Tom Cruise) and like any person they will respond to what you give them....

Make them feel like they're an object or public property?
They won't appreciate it too much.

Create a scene when you spot them?
They're going to want to get away from you as quickly as possible. (And their friends will really want you to go away.)

Interrupt what is clearly a private moment?
You'll be viewed as an unwelcome intrusion.

Be calm and respectful?
You'll be received with respect and appreciation. (Usually.)

Most actors, athletes and celebrities are very nice if you approach them with respect. Most are downright friendly and enjoy meeting fans. (And some, even when they aren't enjoying a situation will pretend they are. They're actors for crying out loud.) Just don't be a spaz. You might actually be able to enjoy a whole conversation instead of just getting a signature on a piece of paper.